The second step is to 'match' the other person's behaviour. People like people who are like them. If you watch people who get on well, you will notice that they tend to match their body postures and gestures. What does this mean? We simply match their physiology, tonality (voice) and words.

So, if they stand, you stand and if they sit down, you sit down. If they cross their legs or arms, you match their movements. It must be done subtly €“ this is not a process of mimicking the other person.

Even matching breathing rate is essential to developing rapport quickly. Observation is also an essential element to creating rapport. Watch how they are breathing, slow or fast, shallow or deeply and match this. Matching the voice tone, speed, pitch and volume is essential.

Consider someone who is very anxious and are speaking very quickly. You would match the speed, pitch and volume of their voice. If you are in rapport, you will notice a shift in that person's physiology within minutes. Their skin tone and/or breathing rate may change. At this point if you slow down your speech to a more calm level, the other person will follow you until they too reach that state. This can have such an amazing effect.

It is an incredible tecnique to use if you are dealing with an angry person or a naughty child!

Matching may sound weird to you, but it really works. The other person will relax quickly as they will unconsciously recognise that you are making an honest attempt to enter into their world. You must be careful when matching, as you must not copy every single detail of the individual's behaviour. This will break rapport quickly.

Matching the other person's body movements, breathing and voice can have incredible impact on the consultation. If you feel that an interaction is not working well, concentrate more on your matching rather than the content. When you are in rapport, you may find that the other person will be more open to your advice.